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Con Schedule: Icon 40

Originally published at Patty Templeton. Please leave any comments there.

Beautiful peopleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Icon 40 is upon us!.

Here be my schedule:

FRIDAY

NADA! High fives me in the halls. I’ll be around.

SATURDAY

10 – Noon – Author Meet and Greet – Exhibit C

Dearest of pals! New friends! I will be hanging around Exhibit C for not thirty minutes. Not an hour. But TWO WHOLE HOURS! I hear that last year Jim C. Hines fenced someone. I wonder what wickedness we can accrue upcoming.

3 – 3:50 p.m. – The Trials of Writing a Strong (Good) Female Protagonist – Room 319

swoon, fran drescher What an oddly named panel. Trials, eh? But I am looking forward to it. I’m also moderating.

Wanna know a bonus? I am gonna tell you a bonus. ANN LECKIE IS ON THE PANEL. (She of Ancillary Justice [AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH])

::swoon::

8 – 8:50 p.m. – Getting Over Writer’s Block – Room 310

Hey. We all get stuck. Let’s talk about digging outta the effin’ not-doing-shit-ditch.

10 – 10:50 p.m. – On-the-Spot Storytelling Adventure – Taft B

My first round robin storytelling panel. I am TERRIFIED! Also, completely game to talk about lemurs in space or whatever other weird shit pops into my brain…because inevitably only weird shit will pop into my brain because I will be nervous becauseeeeeeeeeeeeeeee JOE HALDEMAN AND HIS LOVELY WIFE GAY host this thing.

This is me trying to scoop stories out of the air:

dancing animal gif,tutu gif, prairie dog gif,

 

SUNDAY

11 – 11:50 a.m. – Self-Publishing 101 – Room 315

You wrote A Thing. You want to publish The Thing yourself. Come on down for a discussion about the starting steps.

12 – 12:50 – MY READING! – Room 316

This will be my last reading from There Is No Lovely End for the foreseable EVER! I am writing new stuff and it will soon be plastered everywhere. Come on down for a last hip hip HUZZAH for a fabulous October novel.

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A Cabinet of Curiosities

Originally published at Patty Templeton. Please leave any comments there.

Once every six moons, I get the idea in my head that I can be GODDESS CONCOCTION! QUEEN OF CRAFTING! And I make a thing. Sometimes these tidbits turn into salty, sour wounds because crocheting apocalypse chainmail may be a more intensive activity than I gave it credit for.

BUT! I made a thing. I made it and I love it and I wanted to share it. I am even thinking of making MORE OF THEM! (On different themes)

A good friend of mine got married. I’m a wee bit hard up for cash and I wanted to create a gift for ze newlyweds.

I made a wunderkammer.

Everything in it was a charm dedicated to their intertwined lives. Do I believe in magic? Do I believe in sorcery? Dunno. But I am constantly collecting objects that I feel hold meaning. (Most recently I pocketed six stones at a moonlit Del McCoury show) Maybe I’m a smidge Merricat Blackwood with her sympathetic magic. You gotta make your own import in this world and I do that by surrounding myself with the folks and objects that give my life depth.

So I listened to this:

https://youtu.be/9lFh3dRnrVM?list=PLmF-C1DswBlQus8UNCT7Ad1s4U56sgBoh

And I woodburned and stained this into existence:

curiosity cabinet, wunderkammer

cabinet of curiosities, wunderkammer

curiosity cabinet, wunderkammer

curiosity cabinet, wunderkammer

curiosity cabinet, wunderkammer

 

 

 

Wunderkammer Key

Owl Track: That the path of truth & wisdom may be found together

Long Snouted Beetle: That phenomenal strength may be found in one another

Jar of T. Nelson Downs’ Grave Dirt: That monetary stability may constantly be manipulated into being

Sequoia Pine Cones: That the longevity of redwoods be with the happy couple

Handstitched Satchels of St. John’s Wort: That anxieties are quickly soothed and robust health ensues

Twigs from Hank Williams’ Boyhood Yard: That music may be ever present

Bright Star” Thrice Bound: For passion, beauty, and the constant creation of art

Home-sewn Burlap Sack of Gravel (stolen from a wind farm) & beads (from long-loved jewelry): That only the bright mayblow into the couple’s future

 

And each slash burned into the sides was a well-wish or blessing said for the lovers.

* * *

Lessons learned: I love woodburning. Folk art is fun. Staining takes longer to dry than I thought. I WANT TO DO MORE OF THIS!

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Con Schedule: ReaderCon 26

Originally published at Patty Templeton. Please leave any comments there.

La. La. LAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Another writing convention…this one is my last until OCTOBER! Thank ye Eris. Cause this lady is tired.

Here’s what I got going on:

THURSDAY * 9 pm * CO – What We Don’t Read…and Why?

FRIDAY * XXX

SATURDAY * 10 am * CO – Successfully Writing About Horrible Things

SATURDAY * 2 pm * ENL – Recent Nonfiction Book Club: Dataclysm

SUNDAY * 1 pm * My reading. WOOT!

…I will also be presenting a poem during Saturday’s Most Readerconnish Miscellany.

AND! Here is the rest of the ReaderCon 26 schedule. It looks Le Totes Amazetits.

* * *

And now…just because I found it. More so I heard about it at CONvergence last weekend… THIS MAD MAX: FURY ROAD DOCUMENTARY IS RAD!!!

2 hours of CINEMATOGRAPHY TALK!!!

CLICK ON PIC FOR DOC!!!

mad max fury road

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Con Schedule: CONvergence 2015

Originally published at Patty Templeton. Please leave any comments there.

Well holeeeeeeeeeeee shinola.

I am a good sleep away from driving four hours to Minnesota for my first ever CONvergence!

It is BIG. LIKE A ZILLION PEOPLE. Or maybe just more thousands than I am used to.

Sequins? Check.

Stripes? Yes.

Snacks? Mmhm.

Stompy boots? Oh yeah.

HERE IS MY SCHEDULE!

THURSDAY * 8:30 pm * Doubletree Plaza 1 – Why Are There No Sexy Mummies?

FRIDAY * 12:30 pm * Doubletree Room 2201 – Reading w/ Emmy Jackson

SATURDAY * 11 am * Doubletree Atrium 2 – Getting Over Artist’s Block

SATURDAY * 2 pm * Doubletree Autograph Table B - BOOK SIGNING!

SATURDAY * 8:30 pm * Doubletree Atrium 3 – Twin Peaks Panel

* * *

If you see me, stop me in the hallway and I’ll dance party with you.

High fives and see ya there, ya filthy animals.

tina bob"s burgers

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eBook SALE! For less than a coffee…

Originally published at Patty Templeton. Please leave any comments there.

GHOSTS! GUNS! GRIT! GORGEOUSNESS! All for $1.99 because *BOOM* I’m having a book sale.

Step right up!

Click HERE!

or HERE! or HEREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! for hours of reading pleasure.

You will in the very least experience a MEDICINE WAGON! DARK WHIMSY! ABRAHAM LINCOLN! and A DOG NAMED CORT!

…these being but minor occurrences in a fictitious version of the life of Sarah Winchester before she built her Winchester Mystery House.

Get on it. The eBook is half off for a limited time.

And seriously, it is less than pie at Baker’s Square. You can read my book FOR HOURS AND HOURS longer than you can eat pie. My book is like at least ten hours of pie with the benefit of NO BLOATING! Boo and yah.

*high fives*

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Con Schedule: World Horror 2015

Originally published at Patty Templeton. Please leave any comments there.

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

I am totally stoked. Today, I leave for WORLD HORROR in ATLANTA!

I have never been to World Horror. I have never been to Atlanta. This means ADVENTURE! This year’s WHC theme? THE WEIRD SOUTH!

Here’s my schedule. Come and find me and we’ll fist bump till glitter pops out of our knuckles.

THURSDAY, Dunwich, 10 – 11 pm: Terrifying Tropes: Dark Carnivale: Freaks, Geeks, Magicians and Spiritualists

…YES! Finally a freakin’ panel on CARNIE AND CIRCUS LIT and NONFICTION! AND MOVIES! I’m moderating. And. SERIOUSLY, AND! Daniel Knauf, the creator of CARNIVALE, is going to be on the panel.

I am fangirling here so I don’t blush till blood boils out of my ears in front of him. I mean, CARNIVALE! This:

carnivale entrance

carnivale hbo gif

carnivale hbo ferris wheel

…It’s gonna be a doozy.

FRIDAY, R’Lyeh, 9-10 am: Scarebiz: Choose Your Own Adventure: The Pinnacles and Pitfalls of Self-Publishing

…Do it up! Come and hear the DO NOT DO THIS SHIT and the YES! TOTALLY DO THIS! stories behind self-publishing.

SATURDAY, Sarnath, Noon – 1 pm: Weird South: A Good Horror Isn’t Hard to Find: The Dark Side of Flannery O’Connor and Southern Gothic Literature

…Do I have to convince you to come see folks talk about Flannery O’Connor? I shouldn’t have to. I mean come on. WISE BLOOD! Read it. Watch it. TERRIFYING! GORGEOUSNESS! Let alone her short stories.

* * *

And if I get time while I’m in Atlanta I’m totally going here:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=45YjIVN92-0

OK! OK! OK! I gotta go. I gotta get on the road. See y’all there.

 

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Con Schedule: DemiCon 2015

Originally published at Patty Templeton. Please leave any comments there.

Today is already awesome. I just got a FREE DONUT! It was soft and hot and I PUT IT IN MY MOUTH!

::nom nom nom::

And I have a mega stacked Americano for the tippin’ and sippin’.

Not only do I LOVE the Gizmo shirt I am wearing, I love my rings today. GLORIOUS:

patty templeton hand

Anyways. It is time for another con. Yes, already, dear Liza. This week it is DemiCon. Here’s where I’ll be:

 

FRIDAY, Missouri, 9 pm: It Came From the Midway

SATURDAY, Missouri, 4 pm: My reading!

SUNDAY, Illinois, 10 am: Magic of Music

 

Come party with me. We can dance party or coffee party or book party or bounce party or hallway dance party or donut party. All of the PARTIES! We will get Andrew W.K. on this con.

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Con Schedule: PenguiCon 2015

Originally published at Patty Templeton. Please leave any comments there.

Hey Lovely Fiends and Finagglers,

I am in the magical, working class, badass land of Michigan this weekend for PENGUICON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I like it. It feels homey. It reminds me of Chicagoland with all its bungalows and bars.

ANYWAYS! I am on a crapton of panels and have a book sales table in the Maker Hallway (table #21a, for detail oriented folks).

Here be my panels:

patty templeton penguicon 2015 schedule

Friday

4 pm – Larval Writers – Windover

8 pm - Beginner’s Guide to Self-Publishing – Board of Governors

Saturday

1 pm – From Batgirl to Buffy and Beyond: Librarians in Pop Culture and Real Life – Montcalm

3 pm – Rad Women in Music – Board of Governors

4 pm – Traditional Publishing vs. Self-Publishing – Hamlin

5 pm – Rejection: Dealing with the Darker Side of Creative Life – Board of Governors

Sunday

10 am – You got your SCIFI in my… – Algonquin C

 

…see y’all there!

Tags:

Con Schedule: PenguiCon 2015

Originally published at Patty Templeton. Please leave any comments there.

Hey Lovely Fiends and Finagglers,

I am in the magical, working class, badass land of Michigan this weekend for PENGUICON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I like it. It feels homey. It reminds me of Chicagoland with all its bungalows and bars.

ANYWAYS! I am on a crapton of panels and have a book sales table in the Maker Hallway (table #21a, for detail oriented folks).

Here be my panels:

patty templeton penguicon 2015 schedule

Friday

4 pm – Larval Writers – Windover

8 pm - Beginner’s Guide to Self-Publishing – Board of Governors

Saturday

1 pm – From Batgirl to Buffy and Beyond: Librarians in Pop Culture and Real Life – Montcalm

3 pm – Rad Women in Music – Board of Governors

4 pm – Traditional Publishing vs. Self-Publishing – Hamlin

5 pm – Rejection: Dealing with the Darker Side of Creative Life – Board of Governors

Sunday

10 am – You got your SCIFI in my… – Algonquin C

 

…see y’all there!

Tags:

When the Snot Comes a Creepin’

Originally published at Patty Templeton. Please leave any comments there.

I’ll be sleepin’.

Kinda. I attempted to snooze this entire shit week away but only succeeded in ridding myself of most of it.

Cause I caught a great big, badass bug.

Twas not the thunderous opening to April that I had hungered for.

But betwixt the hacking and sneezing and fever and general self pity, I did one useful thing. I watched documentaries. About two a day. I would wake up…feel crummy…lay on the couch and put on the TV…feel like my brain was overwhelmed…doze off, then watch one more after a nap.

Here they be, in order of viewing:

Back Issues: The Hustler Magazine Story

An equal parts intriguing and irritating view of how Hustler came to be and stuck around. It’s full of tits and lots of assholes…but aholes who made history. If you are in a BRIGHT LIGHTS on HOT PINK VAGINAS mood or want to watch a documentary with a Boogie Nights atmosphere, try it out.

Side note: I used to have a signed, F/F, first edition of Larry Flynt’s Sex, Lies, and Politics. I sold it some odd years back before a big move. I just freaked out like WHAT IF IT IS WORTH HUNDREDS OF DOLLARS NOW? But don’t worry, dudes, a F/F first is like 15 bucks. Whatever. I can live with that. Shit, ok so it jumps to like $37.50 after that lowball one and then to $50, $55, then $70, but WHATEVER I AM OK WITH MY YOUNGER SELF SELLING OFF A PORNOGRAPHER’S MEMOIRS. Ish. Damn it. Oh well.

Just eat the trailer. (Obvs, NSFW)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eNHB3kcwsGI

Harmontown

I have never watched Community.

I have now watched an entire documentary about the writer behind Community doing a national podcast tour after he was fired from the show.

I now want to watch Community.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f0HM11V88rE

Elaine Stritch: Shoot Me

Elaine Stritch was a terrifyingly honest woman who put her who self into her work. This was a portrait of a ferocious, funny woman who couldn’t give half a turtle shit about what people thought about her, so long as she could keep performing.

Frikkin loved this movie. It’s muses on Broadway, bringing art into the world, and kicking the dust from your heels when your time’s up.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQysjiUA68U

Gore Vidal: The United States of Amnesia

Holy shit. Young Gore Vidal was a hottie. Yeah, take me to Italy, dollface.

Dude was flying planes by TEN YEARS OLD, publishing books by 19, a bisexual, politically in tune with the masses though he came from a privileged background, and never afraid to be controversial.

I knew shit about Gore Vidal before seeing this. I think it may have moved him up my neverending reading list. But which book of his? Any suggestions? The Essential Gore Vidal? Myra Breckinridge? The City and the Pillar? Burr?

This probably means I won’t get to him while I am still panting with enthusiasm. Which means it may be never.

THERE ARE TOO MANY BOOKS TO READ. #GoodProblems

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=89QBjnkB63Y

The Overnighters

By far, the most depressing documentary I watched was The Overnighters. It’s about a small town pastor trying to help deal with the influx of homeless workers who’ve come to find jobs in the oil fields outside of Williston, North Dakota. His church has floor space, but his congregation feels “invaded”. It’s becoming hard to juggle his family life, church work, and now shelter work…let alone keeping up with if any of those seeking sanctuary are serious criminals.

It is a hard movie to watch because it is about a man who may have an ego but has a bigger heart and is losing parts of it to everyone around. You just want him to come out all right, but yer not sure he will.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n_50-lKvqF4

Our Vinyl Weighs a Ton: This Is Stones Throw Records

What’s Stones Throw Records? I dunno. I can name abt ten record labels and they’re all punk rock shit. I watched this cause I saw Questlove in the trailer and adore him. Now, I gotta dig myself out of a pit of needing to listen to just about everything this label has ever put out. They’re the kinda record label that’s dedicated to outlier musicians who don’t fit musical norms.

Hell. Yes.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rwZVV_77MhM

That was my sick week.

Before I unlocked the snot-pounding-brain-achievement, I got on the doc kick with Advanced Style and Life Itself. Both are thoroughly worth watching.

Now…

Now…I go to bed at 9:12 p.m. To make sure the mucus minotaur doesn’t split my chest back open.

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